A brief list of things I hope will happen during the 2024 solar eclipse
Keeping my fingers crossed!!
- Gravity turns off for like 10 seconds.
- The heavens will open and the Archangel Michael will collide with me like a heat-seeking missile.
- Carl Sagan does a worldwide voiceover narrating the eclipse that everyone can hear inside their hands, in their native language.
- The moon is finally revealed to be made of cheese, as it melts.
- I’ll get hit by a bus.
- The nuclear strong force and the weak force will trade places, just to see if anyone notices.
- At the last second another smaller star eclipses the moon as the moon is eclipsing the sun, nullifying totality and making it a normal day.